June 29, 2023: Hello everyone! Things have been strange here. One day, Russell went ZIG and Pam went ZAG! She went SMASH, her back went CRACK and her rib went SNAP!! So she hasn’t been much fun. I stayed with her for a while, but then I made carriemom take me to work so I could visit my coworkers and supervise.
Carriemom brought home a plush bear and gave it to pammom, just to admire. But then! Pammom kept the bear!! I let her have it for a while, but I knew it was really for me. I waited until she fell asleep and took him. Now I take Fuzzy Bear to work every day.
Today pammom finally felt like a walk on the beach
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Apr 8, 2023: Hello everyone! I’ve missed you!! We have been very busy. Water come’d down from the sky. Now we have a lake in our front yard. With ducks! (I think they come’d down with the water because we don’t have ducks). A tree went CRASH and some chickens went SMOOSH. But then! Other chickens made babies. I am not allowed to play with them, but everyone else is. This is not fair
 Part of our hill went SLUBSLUB and moved! (I did not know hills could walk!)All of this has made the moms very crabby. I have tried to cheer them up by covering myself with mud and tracking it everywhere, but it hasn’t worked. Today I could finally take them to the beach to make them happy.
We got Thai food first. I wanted to sit at the outside table, but carriemom said, ‘you know why we can’t (frowny face).’ It was only a couple of plates!! And a couple of glasses. And a couple of entrees. Well, it was only once, anyway.
Then we waded in the water. I didn’t get eated by a shark this time. Phew! We finished with some ice cream. Carriemom said maybe it was silly to post pictures because they are always the same. But I say NO!! Every time is the best time and I want to share that with my friends. That made carriemom smile, so that was good
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Jan 5, 2023: Everyone!! Today!!!
Soniamom and I were finishing some afternoon chores and she was escorting me back to the house, when, SUDDENLY!! ThatbaddogLuna came OUT of MY house!?!?! Pammom, carriemom, Soniamom and myfriendtara were all there.
I was confused, but I knew I had to defend my pack!! I threw myself on thatbaddogLuna!! The only reason she is still alive is that Soniamom and myfriendtara jumped in and thwarted my plan by pulling us apart
. I dragged my bloody body into my house and collapsed, knowing that I had fulfilled my duties as PROTECTOR!! I am currently struggling to recover from my wounds. If I do not post again, I love you all Carrie posts:
Patch doesn’t ’identify’ as an older dog, but she definitely got her a$$ kicked by Luna. She has a tiny puncture on her ear that has been treated with neosporin and Brie. I am confident she will live to post again
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Dec 16, 2022: Everyone!! Today I got eated by a shark!!!!
The moms and I were at the beach. They were walking and watching some birds that flew around, then dove into the water - sploosh! They were not watching me
. Suddenly, there was a crash and splash and I got eated by a shark!! I thrashed around and must have scared it away. Sand went everywhere!
 Carriemom helped me stand up and said that I just fell into a hole in the sand that someone had dug. I think she just said that so I wouldn’t feel afraid. That was nice of her, but I’m pretty sure it was a shark. We all sat in the sand until I felt calm again. Then we had tacos
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Nov 4, 2022: Hello, everyone! Today we took a vote and it was 3-0 for going to the beach. Carriemom said we would go the beach where a shark bumped a surfer yesterday! She says that I am chonky like a seal, so I could be the bait (ha-ha). She laughed but Pammom smacked her and frowned.
I was very brave and went into the water even though it was moving! (And had a shark in it!!) The moms were very proud and said that I had scared the shark away! Pammom gave me extra scritches for keeping us safe.
We didn’t see any huskies and only saw one boxer dog. He was too far away for me to hear what he said, but I’m sure it was naughty. I find boxer dogs very disrespectful. Carriemom said maybe I just don’t get their sense of humor. I don’t know what this means, but this time Pammom laughed, so I know it was good.
Then we had ice cream. Best day ever
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Oct 14, 2022: Hello everyone! Today one of our horses wasn’t feeling well. The moms talked a lot and then we put the horse in the box. We drove a long, long way. Carriemom said that ‘driving the rig through SF on a Friday wasn’t much better than a poke in the eye’. I’m not sure what that means but sometimes her knuckles got white!
A very handsome mens doctor talked to us and I made sure to leave some hairs of love on his pants. I also met my newfriendvicky. Her horse was in the hospital, too. We talked about squirrels and llamas.
Now we are in a nice room and pammom is ordering us dinner. I think it will be the Grub person who brings us food when we’re aren’t home. The moms seem happier now so I am getting patchsmell on the bed and carpet so future dogs will know I was here!
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Sep 28, 2022: Hello, everyone!
This afternoon the moms and I worked in the front yard. Carriemom planted a pretty plant with big yellow flowers and fuzzy leaves. I liked the plant, so I started pulling the pretty yellow blooms off with my teeth. This made carriemom remember my special garden name: opatchno!! So fun.
I got hot so I crawled under the truck so my belly could be on cool ground. THEN!! I tried to come back out, but I got stuck. I wasn’t worried because nothing bad ever happens, but the moms got all worked up. Pammom held my head and asked me to lay on my side. Myfriendtara crawled under the truck and pushed on my bottom. Carriemom, Soniamom and myfriendtoby got together and lifted up on the corner of the truck. And I came out!
Carriemom said, ‘I don’t care what time it is, I need a drink!’ She told me that if I do it again she’ll leave me under there until I loose enough weight to get out on my own! (The vet thinks I am a chunky monkey). I don’t think she’d really do that, tho. I will let you know
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Sep 13, 2022 Carrie posts for Patch: Hello, everyone!
Patch had to get a growth removed from her eyelid today. The vet gave her some kick-ass happy sauce and Patch is very high. She passed out on my shoulder for the drive home.
She wants me to tell you she loves you. All of you! So very much. She loves you, man!! Now that I’ve done that I’m going to use a sharpie to draw some eyebrows on her before she wakes all the way up
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| Sep 3, 2022:
Hello everyone! This was a very good week!!
Myfriendkiki came to visit and do horse things with pammom. She is very nice AND she brought a mens with her! (I love men
). While myfriendkiki did the horse thing FRANCESCO sat with ME!! He liked me very much and said very lovely things that I didn’t understand. Pammom said that’s because he was speakingitalian, but I’m not sure. I sat on his foot and watched him speakingitalian to me while he rubbed my ears. Sigh
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| Aug 10, 2022:
Hello everyone!! What an exciting day! We found a baby thing that needed help. Carriemom said it was a possum and that it should still be with its mom, but that someone tried to eat the baby, then dropped it. I wanted to clean the cut, but the moms said better not. (I would have done a good job, tho).
We put the baby thing in a box and drove for awhile. The moms gave the thing to a lady in a place. Then carriemom said we were close to the boat place and that we should go eat fishes. So we did! When we got there the seals were having a big dance party!!
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July 22, 2022: Hello everyone! Things have been very exciting here! So many men in big trucks. Flying things that dropped other things! Everyone seems very stressed so I have been given the job of Emotional Support Lab Mens came and said youareundermandatoryevacuationorders, or something like that. My moms said NO, we have too many fur and feather friends here! The mens made frowny faces but my moms kept saying NO. I am very stubborn and I think my moms wanted to be like me.
And then!! Myfriendssoniatobytaraandsabrina were doing, I’m not really sure, and a flying thing dumped stuff and they all turned pink!! I needed to clean them but carriemom said better not or I’d get sick. I’m not sure this is true. I think she just likes pink.
This morning we went on a drive to see how things looked. We ran into another frowny man who said youareunderblah blah blah, (I think he needed a hug) so we smiled and went back home and carriemom said justrakeupanythingthatburnsffs! Myfriendpatsy and myfriendjen came and helped us do that. So fun! I think we should have frowny mens and flying things every day.
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My role involves sitting in the car or my vehicle and giving hugs and kisses to anyone who needs them. I don’t know what is so stressful, I’m having a great time!!
| June 8, 2022:
Hello everyone
 . Carriemom says I have to tell my friends that I was a verybaddog today. Mens came to mark the ground for solar panels. Right now that spot is inside a horse place where Balou and Tucker live. I followed the mens in (I love mens!) to help them. It’s not my fault that Balouthehorse rubs me the wrong way! I charged him! (kinda) and he charged me! (sorta) There was lots of yelling and screaming.
I don’t see why the moms are so mad. Didn’t I keep the buffalo, antelope and bears away?!?! If I can do that, a horse is easy peasy!
Instead of thanking me, carriemom gave a talk: what-were-you-thinking-get-your-damn-fool-head-kicked-in-yap yap yap.
Afterwards, I made a point of being extra helpful with the chickens. I didn’t chase ANY. But the moms are still grouchy and I think carriemom is getting ready for another talk. Sigh
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June 6, 2022: Hello everyone! We tried to go to the big party on Saturday night, but the lines were too long. The moms said we could have a dance party of our own!
Today we drove the last part home. The moms said I was ‘a pest’ because I kept asking to go walkies. It’s not my fault that I get bored! Audio books are dumb. Blah blah blah.
I was sleeping until we turned onto our street and carriemom opened the windows. I jumped up when I smelled Homesmell. I can’t wait to go back to work tomorrow and see all my friends again. While we were gone a sneaky chicken hatched out seven chicks! Now we have…no one really knows how many chickens we have now. I will let you know
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| June 4, 2022:
Hello everyone! We cooked our dinner over our fire!! Carriemom says we grilled Buffalo, but not the Buffalo I barked at. We also grilled vegetables (I like vegetables
 ) and carriemom made bread over the fire, too. It was yummy but then we all smelled like smoke.Yesterday we drove across the ‘Wyoming’ again and came back to the salty place. Today we all went on a boat ride. Our guide was a mens and I liked him very much. I got a little scared on the ramp and coming off the boat, but the moms said be brave and the mens (nate
) boosted me.There’s something going on here called ‘pride.’ There is lots of musics and people and foods. I am very excited but the moms say the ground is too hot for me. I’m going to try to talk them into going later. I will let you know
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| June 1, 2022:
Hello everyone! I am posting pictures of all of the Things that I’ve barked at and kept away from our car so far. The moms say I am very brave. Carriemom says the picture of the woof is ‘ironic’ but I don’t know what that means.
I stepped on a pricker but carriemom fixed it. When our car stepped on a pricker she couldn’t fix it. The door to the fixing place said, ‘No Animals Inside,’ but the mens said I could come in because I am clearly a GoodDog.
I have been helping gather pine cones and kindling for our fire. Taking lots of naps in between.
Tonight we are cooking our dinner over the campfire. Life is good
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May 30, 2022: It was…I’ve never…couldn’t believe…moms said ‘shhhhhh’…I said WHAT?!?
They licked the rain off our CAR!! Then scratched!!! Horns went THUNK!! Car rocked!!
I don’t…
(Patch checked in SAFE from the wildlife loop at Custer State Park)
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May 29, 2022: Hello everyone! We had a big day today. We had to drive across a big place called ‘Wyoming.’ I had planned to nap while Carriemom gave her talk: geological-formations-of-southern-wyoming-and-surrounds. Her talks are best to nap to. But THEN! Suddenly, the rain started dancing and the ground turned white! And carriemom stopped talking. Pammom decided to give a talk instead: will-we-need-chains-wtf-is-that-SLEET?!? So I slept through that instead. When I woke up it was sunny, so I guess it might all have been a dream. I’m not sure
We saw a big billboard that said, ‘Antelope entering highway at 55mph’. All three of us thought that sounded awesome!! But all of the antelope we saw were just grazing or walking. I offered to go out and get them up to speed but the moms said no. Very disappointing
We saw a man on a bike. He left Oregon a month ago…with a cat in the front basket! I didn’t know cats did that
 It was getting dark when we got to the special place, but my nose says we are someplace wonderful. We are in our sleeping place and I can’t wait until morning.
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May 27, 2022: Hello everyone!! The moms have put lots of things in our car! They told me that I am invited on a trip, but no horses and no chickens. I am dressed and ready! I will let you know what happens next
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| April 30, 2022:
Hello everyone!! We have been doing so many Things!
Our horse Lily had a baby. Carriemom wanted one of the Boxes made ready in case Lily and the Baby needed to visit the horse doctor. First, we had to move the baby chickens that were living in the Box. I helped make a special pen for them. After carriemom gave the Box a bath, I got to go IN the Box! This was very exciting for me.
Then! I got a promotion to assistant arena dragger at Rancho Viejo. Now I get to ride in the vehicle while pammom makes the arena smooth, instead of waiting on the stand. (Then I get to roll and scratch my back). All my friends are very proud of me.
Carriemom said that I am the founder of Napsianism. I don’t know what this means, but she says it is the practiceofultimateselfcare. I didn’t understand this either, but I wagged to encourage her. She said that I am the best napper she’s ever met
 The goats and the burros came in to get their toes trimmed. Thatbaddogluna made friends with the burro, Jill. I licked a goat’s nose!! I would really like to chase those goats, pammom says not to
 . (I would also like to chase that baby horse, but don’t tell!)I hope all of you are as happy as I am
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I wanted to know what the NEXT project will be, but carriemom just stared at me, shook her head and walked away. It’s ok, tho. She gets grumpy sometimes. I will let you know
| Mar 12, 2022:
Hello everyone! I am so excited!!
Today, carriemom gave a talk: Trimming-the-Redwoods-so-we-don’t-burn-up. (But it wasn’t even that hot today, so, ??). Myfriendshelly helped us move the tree pieces that carriemom didn’t want anymore to Greenwaste. (It’s just a big pile) I had pammom use my cart, too, so we could move even more!
The moms said that now we can finally finish-the-arena-fence. Carriemom said there was NO WAY she was digging all those fence post holes! Pammom said, ‘but you’re the one with the PhD!’ ha-ha. Carriemom explained that a PhD is a post-hole-digger. ha-ha. I still don’t get it, tho. Instead, she ordered a machine to help. It will be here Monday. Myfriendtara and myfriendtoby and myfriendsabrina AND myfriendsonia will all be here to join our project! Myfriendsabrina is bringing costcopizza (I love pizza) for us all to share!! You should come, too! Carriemom says everyone can have a PhD. Ha-ha We will share pictures of our party
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| March 8, 2022:
We ended up with 7 goats safely contained in the barn and three goats across the street in the swale. Tara suggested bringing one of the burros to the swale to act as a goat magnet.
The following photos show 1) just how close they got to successfully moving goats from swale to barn. 2) just how badly wrong it went after that. 3) just how far down the road squeak dragged Tara.
Not shown is Toby diving into the bushes OUTSIDE the pasture, where the goats ended up. The three wayward goats are back in the pasture and we will try again tomorrow. The vet doesn’t get here until 11:30. What could go wrong?
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March 8, 2022: Hello everyone! I only have a minute! We are bringing in the goats for spring shots. It is very exciting and I am a very good supervisor. Maybe I will get a promotion!  |
| Feb 26, 2022:
Hello everyone!! There have been so many Things happening!!!
There are many, tiny squeaky toys in one of the Boxes. I REALLY want to go play with them but carriemom says I mustn’t go in. But SHE goes in!
This isn’t fair. I will talk to myfriendjoe on Thursday about contacting the National Labrador Relations Board. (I like joe very much). Then!! Water came shooting out of the ground! Whoosh! I thought this was wonderful because the mud was cool on my belly. The moms were frowny because nowthetanksareemptyandthearenaisdusty. I think that’s what they said. But my tummy is still happy. Today, I supervised the repair work. Myfriendtara and pammom said a bunch of bad words, so I had to go clean them and cheer them up. I had to take some time to nap, tho.
Oh! And, then!!! Remember how tarasbaddogluna stole the horse pills? (She lived
 ). I told carriemom that something ‘Must be Done!! Now we have Class a couple of days every week. I show baddogluna how to walk politely, sit and shake. Then carriemom tries to do that with the baddog. (I always do it best, tho). Sometimes, myfriendtoby brings her dogs: thatone and whatshername. Myfriendsabrina brought her dog, whycantcassiecalmdown, to a few Classes, but now Cassie has gone to Away Camp for two weeks. I hope myfriendsabrina remembers to pick her up! Maybe she’ll bring the roosters back!!I will let you know
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| Feb 13, 2022:
Carriemom posts:
While I fully supported Patch’s promotion to Assistant and the purchase of the Patchmobile, I need to address some claims made by Patch.
These photos, taken in secret, by me (who was ACTUALLY working), represent Patch’s true daily work product.
Just sayin’
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| Jan 30, 2022:
Patch posts:
Hello everyone! I hope your weekend was as awesome as mine. I assistanted many lessons. Today, Tara’s friend Sarah, came to visit. Sarah liked me very much and said she would be MY assistant!! I had Sarah assistant for awhile so I could take a nap. (She gives good butt scrubs, too)
This afternoon we got some roosters ready to go to Freezer Camp first thing tomorrow morning. I am not sure what this means. We take the roosters to Camp, but they never come home! I think carriemom may forget to pick them up. Now that I have an assistant I will ask her to look into it and let us know.
I got very excited when I helped Sonia and the moms play ‘chicken jenga’. I really, really wanted to chomp the roosters, but carriemom said better not. (I don’t see why not, tho
 ). We have one more rooster to catch in the morning. Carriemom is sad, but said he has been ‘quite rude to the ladies, and has to go.’ I don’t know what this means, but I will help her in the morning. I am hoping these are the roosters that make posole! The last ones did a very good job
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| Oct 25, 2021:
Hello everyone!
Today the moms and I walked around to see what the storm did. There were branches on the ground and a fence felled over. We looked at it for a while, then carriemom said something grumpy and we walked off. I wasn’t really listening.
I really wanted to go to the dog park, but the moms said I couldn’t go in because it was too wet. We walked around the duck pond instead. I almost caught two squirrels!
I heard both moms laugh and my tail wagged just fine. I thought I’d let you know
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| Oct 21, 2021:
hello everyone. today was not the best day ever. carlton Left today. carriemom explained to me that even the bestest of good dogs can’t stay forever, even tho we want them to. but I didn’t really understand.
now the moms are crying, carlton isn’t here and my tail won’t wag. we miss him very much.
pammom says we won’t always be this sad. that we will laugh again and remember all of the great times we all had.
I will let you know
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| Sep 20, 2021:
Hello everyone! Oh! Today!!!! The moms took us to the beach, which is always a good thing. We all waded, then sat and enjoyed the view.
A man was fishing, but what he pulled in wasn’t a fish! Carriemom said it was a bat ray and it was like a slimy bird with a stingy tail. After the man removed the hook, the ray couldn’t breathe on the beach! It’s tail was whipping all over. Carriemom put her sweatshirt on slimybird’s tail, then she and the man pulled it back to the water. I knew they needed my help, but pammom wouldn’t let go of my leash! I was very worried but they finally got slimybird to swim away and we were all happy again.
Then! I met a surfer who kissed me and gave me butt scrubs. I liked her very much.
THEN!! Two mens came to help us fold up our beach tent. (I love mens) Pammom said she didn’t need help, but the mens kept helping. Carriemom told me that they were ‘very stoned,’ but I didn’t see any rocks, just sand. I don’t know… Pammom got a little grouchy but carriemom just laughed and laughed. Carlton liked the men with the long hair and let that men pat him! Then I got butt scrubs again.
AND THEN!!! Three wiener dogs in a car started yelling at us in our car! Carlton and I yelled back. Then their mom and our moms started yelling. It was awesome!!!
Now we are going to go feed Cheerios to seagulls. Best day ever!
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| Sep 8, 2021:
Hello everyone! Today. Carriemom gathered up all our plush toys and washed them. We had them just the way we liked them!! Now they smell terrible. Carriemom said it was us or them, tho, so I guess it was for the best.
We stopped at the farmers market and shared some blackberries and I also ate a rambutan! Not Carlton tho, he says that’s not food for dogs.
Then I had an appointment at the vet. Carriemom has been watching a lump on my side and got a little worried. The vet said it’s only a fatty tumor and not to worry. Carriemom laughed and told the vet that ‘fatty tumor’ is my car name when I won’t sit in the back seat! Haha. The vet made a frown face. Maybe that’s her special car name. I will let you know.
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| Aug 28, 2021:
Today!! We all worked on making a new fence around one of the dog play areas (but we let the horses use them, too). The old fence went CRASH down!
Then we dug holes and started putting up the new fence. Luna and I are very good diggers, but the moms weren’t always happy with where we did it!
Sabrina and Alden brought Cassie over to help and all us dogs ran around and got tangled up in the project. It was great!! Luna made Carlton mad so yelled at her and made her sit in the Husky and not come out. That was ok with me! She bugs me, too, sometimes. I got hot and tried to go wading in the water bucket. It made a huge mess and we all had fun playing in it.
I hope your day was good, too.
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| Aug 13, 2021:
Hello everyone! We took the box to go look at a horse for…someone. I’m not sure. The best part is that Soniamom came with us! Sonia is the first friend that Carlton made when he was still shy, so he’s extra happy. We stopped at Starbucks and all shared breakfast sandwiches. I brought my new plush toy and everyone likes it very much.
The moms want me and Carlton to use steps to get in and out of the truck, instead of jumping. Carlton does because he is very polite, but I say ‘no’! I can be very stubborn
 . Today, I made Pam and Sonia push while carrie bribed me from the other side. I’m hoping that they’ll give up and let me jump in next time. Carriemom used some words I won’t repeat here, so I think she’s mad at the steps, too.Now we are someplace flat, hot and very sunny. Pammom and Soniamom are looking at the horse while carriemom keeps our ac going. There may be some napping.
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Aug 8, 2021: Carlton and I are helping with arena maintenance
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Aug 2,2021: Saltwater is the solution to everything: sweat, tears or the ocean.
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| June 22, 2021:
Hello everyone! Carlton had a dental appointment today and we all had to be there by 7am. We all took a vote and decided to drive the day before so we could go to the beach and stay closer to the vet’s office.
Carlton and I did some wading and rolled in the sand. Then we all shared pizza. The stairs in our place were very steep and I was too scared to go up. Pammom gave us treats and helped us be brave. Carlton was too scared to go down and we needed treats to go down, too. This made both moms make big sighs. Maybe the stairs scared them, too!
Then! A pool party started behind our place! I wanted to go, but carriemom said better not, that 1am was for SLEEPING! But we weren’t sleeping by then anyway, so I still think we should have gone. (She’s been a little cranky all day. Maybe she wishes we’d gone, too).
We walked Carlton in to his appointment and waited for him to get sleepy. I waited with the moms in the parking lot until he was done. I asked for extra walkies and attention so they wouldn’t sit and worry. When Carlton came out the lady said he lost three teeth. Carriemom says that’s ok, tho, he has more!
Now we’re home and waiting for Carlton to wake all the way up. I tried to get him to play, but he just muttered about goat-floats-on-rooster-run-squirrel-swims and went back to sleep, so I’m not sure. I will let you know!
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May 28, 2021: Carlton and I are teaching Luna how to use the arena.
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| May 8, 2021:
Hi everyone!! I’ve been busy! Yesterday morning we all got up super early and put some horses in the box and drove away with them. Carriemom says they are girl horses who are going to make baby horses. We hope. After we dropped them off we went to Starbucks and that helped a lot.
At the end of the day, instead of going home for dinner, we all got in the car and drove away. Again! Carriemom said we were going to another horse place but no way was she taking the box! She says ‘driving the rig thru LA is about as much fun as...’ well, I can’t repeat that. Since it was going to be veryvery late when we got to San Diego we had to stop for dogsdinner part way. I met a little boy who was scared until I kissed him. Carriemom showed him how to give me butt scrubs and that made him laugh. Then we found another Starbucks and it cheered everyone up. We also saw a car that tried to climb a wall! It made all of the other cars go so slow that the moms said we might save on a hotel by having to drive all night. Ha-ha.
We had to get up early again to go to the horse place so we had to find another Starbucks! The moms were happy when we left that place, until they noticed that we had eaten the rest of the bran muffins while they were away. Things got very quiet until we hit the next Starbucks. (Fiber is good for dogs!)
Our drive home took a long time and required several more stops at Starbucks. The moms were silly and made up words for a song. The chorus went, ‘oh lord, stuck on the grapevine again.’ It was very fun. When we stopped for gas we saw a wonderful thing. It was a dog riding on a motorcycle!! He had goggles and a safety belt. I wanted to try but Carlton said it would be too scary and carriemom said better not. That dog was cool!
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And his men was very smiley and laughed with us. Oh! And! All seven of the incubator eggs hatched while we were gone! I will go check them in the morning. The moms are pooped and say they will fall asleep as soon as the caffeine wears off. Ha-ha
| Apr 27, 2021:
Another trip! We put a horse in our box and drove a long way. When we got to the horse place there were three dogs. The biggest dog’s name was Otis. Carriemom said she got a good picture of me and Carlton yelling at the dogs to stay away from our truck! I was very vicious until my foot hit the window button and the window started to roll all the way down. I almost went out the window onto those dogs! Carriemom says it’s a good thing my tail is so sturdy because it was what kept me out of trouble!! Again! We left the horse there and drove a lot more.
We slept in a little house by a river. It was too cold to wade, so we just barked at the geese. Carlton offered to drive the next morning but carriemom said he was way too stoned to drive. Pammom and I laughed that THAT was why carriemom said he couldn’t drive. (We all know it’s because he can’t reach the pedals!)
The moms took us to petsmart to pick out toys and treats so that was fun. I got a plush mimosa and Carlton got a hot dog. Then we went to another horse place and put that horse in our box. Then! We went to a Target and waited! A men drove up and took another horse out of his box and put it into ours. He wasn’t a smiley men so carriemom said better not bother him. I think I could have cheered him up tho.
I had a long nap until we got home. I don’t know what the moms did all of that time, but now they are kind of cranky. I think they should sleep with us in the back seat next time! Then they would like these trips as much as we do
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| Apr 12, 2021:
Our trip! On the drive down Sunday afternoon, carriemom gave a talk: Driving-to-Temecula-After-Being-Rudely-Awakened-at-3am. I was very interested in her talk because that was right around the time Carlton and I had had to go out and protect the back yard from intruders and I hoped we could compare notes. (Carlton said it was a mountain lion, but I think it was a ninja-turkey). Sadly, I fell asleep almost immediately, so I missed most of her talk.
When we got to the hotel Carlton took a happy pill. He says it makes him feel floaty and his tummy doesn’t get so rumbly. He slept right through the man who knocked on our door. (I love men!). This men just handed the moms a bag of food!! (I love food!) (except starfruit. I won’t eat starfruit). Carriemom called him Grub...something. We all shared the food Grub brought and we even got some udon broth for our breakfast.
Today the woman at the Starbucks said I was adorable. (I am). She offered me a puppachino but carriemom said better not because I’m supposed to be on a diet. Carriemom gave me some blueberries from her oatmeal instead, so that was ok.
When we got to the horse place, three dogs ran right up to the car! I jumped in carriemom’s lap and yelled, ‘you GO AWAY right now!! These are MY moms and this is MY car!!’ I waited for carriemom to drive us to safety, but instead, both moms got out!! They LEFT me there and walked away with those dogs!! Carlton was no help because he was still sleeping off his pill. I was mad and sad.
When we left the horse place I just sat and looked out the back window. I think carriemom knew my feelings were hurt because she declared it Official-Breakfast-for-Dinner day! We stopped on our drive home and shared pancakes and bacon, so I knew everything was ok. Now we’re home. Carlton and I secured the back yard and now he’s asleep again. Carriemom says those pills must have some serious happy in them
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Apr 11, 2021: Carriemom said Carlton and I should stay home for this horse shopping trip because we are ‘a pain’. It was a close one, but we got pammom to change sides so carriemom was outvoted 3-1. Again
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| Mar 19, 2021:
Our roosters never came back after they made dinner. I think carriemom misses them because today we got two more. When we arrived there was a dog named Diesel! The moms would not let us out of the truck to greet him, which I thought was very rude.
THEN! We saw our opportunity! When pammom opened her door to get back in, I dove for the opening!! Carlton crawled over the top of me. Carriemom had my tail in one fist and Carlton’s tail in the other! Pammom pushed on our chests and we all yelled and sang together. It was GREAT!!
Carriemom says no more rooster runs for us because we are BADDOGS, but she’s said that before. On the drive home she gave a lecture called What-on-Earth-something-something. Then all four of us shared a piece of Gizdich pie so I know everything is ok. I’m going to ask these roosters if they know how to make posole!
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| Mar 12, 2021:
We have been so busy! We went to a farmers market that allowed dogs!! I met a very nice lady who sells flowers. She said my wags gave her energy. She gave me a hug and I kissed her. We listened to a man make music. Another lady said I should get a job at that market! I will let you know.
We went to a beach and most of the dogs looked like me and Carlton! The moms and dads laughed and said they’d have to make sure to leave with the right dogs. (But we all knew who our people were!) This time carriemom slipped and fell in the water. Splash! But her head didn’t go under. And she wasn’t chasing a husky. She said she landed on her dignity. (But it looked to me like she landed on her bottom.)
The roosters made very good chili. But they haven’t come back. Carriemom said we will get more soon. Pammom groaned and said can’t we have a break. But carriemom said don’t be a grump. Sometimes Carlton gets grumpy, too. But carriemom and I can usually get them both to play again.
We worked in the yard and I helped plant some tomato seedlings. Carlton barked at the horses who live in the next field. Pammom deepooped the yard and said maybe the dogs should get fed less. Haha. I did not think this was funny.
The moms go back to work tomorrow but that’s ok. Carlton and I will wait for them to come back so we can have more adventures
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| Mar 10, 2021:
Our staycation is very fun. We went to the dog park and met some dogs. The little dog’s name was Obie and he liked to be chased. Another dog came, but we were done playing by then so we just hung out and smelled things.
Sometimes people bring carriemom roosters. I don’t know why. Carlton and I like to go look at them and we would very much like to play with them. Carriemom says better not. Her money is on the roosters haha. I don’t know what this means. ANYWAY! Yesterday the roosters were gone!! I looked all over! Pammom says they went to make dinner. I did not know roosters can cook! I will let you know.
Carriemom says that roosters are loud, difficult and can’t get along no matter how you try. Pammom says that sounds like some people we know! Haha. The house smells very good because there is soup and chili simmering. Maybe the Roosters made it! I will let you know.
We have also had some good nap
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| Mar 7, 2021:
The moms said that this afternoon is the start of our ‘staycation.’ This means the pack will stay together and do lots of things, so I am very happy.
I pulled all of the blankets off of the couch so Carlton and I could play and be silly. The moms decided that a walk would be a good idea so we went to our town for walkies and a Sunday paper. We went to the place with lots of rocks. Carriemom says it’s a place for people who were here but aren’t here anymore. But I don’t know what that means.
She says one of the rocks is someone with the same name as the road by our house. She calls it ‘historic’ but I think that just means it’s an old rock. Another rock is someone who came here with a ‘Donner Party.’ They have a rock and a building in town, too. I love parties! Carriemom said I would have been very welcome at THAT party. Haha. Pammom laughed and said that carriemom was a BADDOG for saying that. It’s not my fault that I am chubby! I just like all foods.
On the way home we saw some boy turkeys trying to impress some girl turkeys. When the moms said ‘gobble-gobble,’ the turkeys gobbled back!! Carlton and I tried, but that made them run away. We will definitely try again, tho!
I think we will do many things and have much fun this week! I will let you know
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Feb 22, 2021: It’s me again!!! TODAY! We went to the beach. I was very brave and waded even though the water was moving. (I’m not a strong swimmer). THEN! A husky came by. (I don’t like huskies. The moms don’t understand why and I won’t say. Mystery is fun!) I ran as hard as I could to chase it, through the water! I didn’t see that there was a dip in the sand and I FELL! Splash! My whole head went under water! I was embarrassed, but the husky said ‘any dog that’s willing to do THAT is not a dog to mess with!’ And it ran away
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Feb 21, 2021: Today carriemom asked if we wanted to do something silly and fun. I yelled ‘YES’ and Carlton touched the doorknob with his nose. We drove to a new place and saw...I’m not sure! The moms said they were ‘dinosaurs’ but I think they were big chickens. We have chickens but carriemom says better not chase them. I don’t think I would chase these chickens. They were very big!! Some of them yelled and some looked right at us! I liked it very much, but Carlton started shaking so that was sad. Then! When we left a man was laying in the street!! We yelled at him because you don’t go in the street! But carriemom said better not because it was mean to yell at someone who fell off their motorcycle. (It DID cheer up Carlton, tho). Now we are waiting to pick up dim sum to share on the drive home. Then we will roll in the fresh sand the moms put in Carlton’s sand box (he likes to put his tummy in sand). Best day ever
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Jan 31, 2021: Today I told the moms that I needed to go do THINGS by jumping in circles while barking shrilly. Never fails! We drove to town for a Sunday paper and a walk around. We went by a big man who scared Carlton, but carriemom says she thinks he’s the man our town is named for, so I wasn’t scared. A family was getting in their car so I tried to jump in, too. ( I like to go in cars). Carriemom said better not, she’d miss me too much.
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THEN!! We were waiting to cross a street when this dog started jumping up and down behind his fence. Every time he popped up he yelled, “HEY!” We yelled back and had a very good time. There were lots of people sitting outside and eating. They were smiley, so I went inside an ‘outdoor seating’ to make friends and share snacks! The carriemom reminded me that she made us chicken for dinner and asked to come back. I hope the people weren’t too dissapointed. Maybe next Sunday. We walked all over and then had Harry Potter Watter at our car. This is special water that doesn’t fall out, no matter how hard we try. Best of all, we stopped on the way home to yell at our neighbor’s cows through the fence. One of them even trotted away!! 
Jan 19, 2021: Disaster!!! A big wind came last night so Carlton had to take a sleeping pill. (I wasn’t scared). While he was sleeping someone threw the greenhouse across the yard! (Carlton does the guarding and nighttime barking). Carriemom is sad about her plants and I can’t cheer her up by tipping her pots. Someone tipped them already! Maybe I can find a shoe and ask her to chase me
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Jan 18, 2021: oday!! I helped carriemom garden. We looked at the place where her baby fig tree used to live. I chewed it all up. I’m a good chewer. She said some things but I wasn’t really listening. I hope she plants another one soon! Next I helped her in the green house. I tip pots over so she can set them up again. It’s a great game I invented and I think it’s her favorite. Carriemom has given me a special ‘garden name’: Ohpatchno. I like it very much!
Then! We got Thai food and ate it at the beach. The moms say we can only do takeout there because of the whole dishes and table thing. We didn’t really break that many! There were seals very close to shore. I think they would have played with us, but the moms wouldn’t let us swim out to them. We stayed until a little girl started yelling and jumping up and down. Carlton yelled with her so we had to leave.
Then!!! Carriemom said that since we hadn’t broken, dented or pooped on anything all day that we could get ice cream. I get really excited about ice cream. I accidentally sat on Carlton’s ice cream! But he wasn’t mad and we spent the drive home licking the back seat clean.
Now I am napping until carriemom needs my help making gnocchi. Yum!
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Jan 11, 2021: Today we went for a walk at the park. I saw a big squirrel! I feel that I could have caught this one if I hadn’t been on a leash. Then we shopped for dinner. Carriemom says I am the bestest sou chef. We will be making black bean tacos because one of our friends is something called a ‘vegan.’ Carriemom explained what that is but Carlton and I think she must be joking with us. She said that cats can’t be vegan, but dogs can. Wouldn’t that be fun ha-ha. NO!!! (Have I mentioned that I love cheese?)
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Dec 27, 2020: Today we all went to Home Depot for Things. I love Home Depot because there are often men there. (I love mens). I got excited and jumped over carriemom and out the door when she opened it. There was a big noise! It made the man in that car come out and talk to carriemom. They talked about something called a ‘dent,’ but I wasn’t really paying attention. (Have I mentioned that I love mens?) This men was frowny, tho. Carlton thinks that Home Depot is really loud and he sometimes barks at the Halloween displays. Today Carlton got distracted by the loud, I think. He didn’t notice that he needed to go walkies until...he just did. All over the aisle!! Carriemom had to take us back to the parking lot while pammom made things ok. We even ended up going home with some extra cleaning products!! Carlton felt really bad, so I had to cheer him up. The Moms said these things happen. But I think we will leave the back door open tonight. I hope we go to Home Depot again soon!!
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Dec 12, 2020: I got a christmas toy!
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Nov 24, 2020: Carriemom came in to start something she calls "bread pudding" for thanksgiving and found ME!! On my couch! She says that she may be adding grilled Labrador to the meal
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Oct 8. 2020: Today!! A boxer dog crossed in front of our car. He said something that I won’t repeat! Carlton shoved his head out of the window and yelled, “Dooky-head! DOOKY-head!” I found that by putting one foot on the gear shift, the other foot on Pammom’s stomach and moving the rear view mirror, I was able to jam most of my body onto the dashboard and shout, “No!! YOU’RE a baddog!!” Pammom yelled, “What is the MATTER with you?!?” and carriemom shouted, “you’re going to get us all KILLED!” Even the driver behind us honked in support!! Good times. Fortunately, by then the light had turned red again so we had plenty of time to reorganize and get the car out of neutral. Carriemom started The Discussion about dropping us off at the nearest animal shelter (first time this trip!), but it must have all worked out because I just woke up as we drove up our driveway. Now I can return to my current project: digging up the treasures that Carriemom hides for me to find. She calls them her ‘bulbs’. Maybe after a nap.
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Oct 7, 2020: today we took a vote and decided to go wine tasting, then to lunch. Before we left Carriemom gave a talk: The-Disaster-at-the-Thai-Place-2019. We all agreed that no tables would be overturned and no crockery broken. (In our defense, it WAS a husky). Carlton had to have a time out at wine tasting, but no dishes broke. We decided that it was safest to do take-away for lunch. We all shared tapas and had a good time. Naps, then evening walkies.
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Oct 6, 2020: Today!! Wow!! I think Carlton was scared to get on the boat, so I jumped right on to show him it was ok. We saw birds and fish and boats!! We stopped twice on the shore for swims and snacks. Then!! We go’d around a corner! A tree branch went Whoosh! And carriemom went swimming! Right there in the river! Then the boat tipped and pammom and Carlton went swimming, too!! I stayed in the boat and was captain until they all got back in. (I’m not a strong swimmer) We all had fun and now we’re having ice cream. Carriemom mom said maybe there is a fish with a stigmasomething that can make use of her glasses, ha-ha.
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Oct 5, 2020: today we went to a new beach. It was fun, but I only waded. We all shared fish and chips. I thought I saw a husky, but it was a poodle that needed a trim, so that was ok. Tomorrow the four of us are going ‘kayaking’ on the river. I don’t know what this is, but it made carriemom laugh and ask, ‘what could possibly go wrong?!’ I think we will find out in the morning. I’m resting up for our adventure.
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Oct 4, 2020: We are someplace new. I SWAM for the first time ever! Didn’t just wade. It’s much easier when the water holds still! Carlton was very proud of me. We’re having pizza and planning tomorrow. Hoping Carlton doesn’t explode overnight. What’s a ‘cleaning deposit’?
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Sep 28, 2020: what a day! We went to petsmart to pick out our treats. Carlton picked Choppers. He always picks Choppers which is good, because they are the best treats! Another dog peed IN THE STORE!! We offered to go help, but the moms said no. I feel there was a missed opportunity here. Next we went to Home Depot! I found a man kneeling in an aisle and got in much kissing and cleaning. The man has a labradoodle and he kissed me back! Then!! We went to the beach! It wasn’t an off-leash beach so we had to keep Carriemom with us when we went swimming. She acted like the water was VERY cold, but I think it was about 55 degrees. That seems like a lot of degrees to me! On they way home we stopped at Phil’s and got squidses. Pammom and Carriemom shared, but not too much. We just got the car cleaned from the last time Carlton ate greasy food! No huskies. Would definitely recommend. Best day ever!!
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Aug 16, 2020: Carriemom says: We had thunder and lightning non stop last night. Poor Carlton was terrified! We had some ant-anxiety meds left over from his dental appointment. They calmed him down enough to go back to sleep. We didn’t realize how long acting they are. He’s still happily wasted. I feel bad laughing at him but he really is that friend who’s smoked waaaaaaaay too much weed!
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